A few months ago I started receiving Money magazine in the mail. Clearly I am not the kind of guy who reads investment advice
or understands market analysis so I would never have ordered a subscription to
this magazine. After a little investigation it turns out that a very cheap
airline that I rarely fly (because they are cheap, always late and have
terrible customer service) decided to reimburse me for the very few “frequent
flyer” miles I had accumulated with a generous year-long subscription to Money
magazine. Now do you see why I quit flying with them?
Normally I toss the magazine in the trash without even
looking at it but I was bored this week and browsed through the new edition. I
found an article entitled “Presidents and Money” and was intrigued. It featured
economic quotes from all 45 presidents along with a small paragraph and a
cartoon drawing of them all. This article was tailor-made for my short
attention span plus there were pictures so naturally I read the whole thing.
The story starts with George Washington’s quote, “Cherish
public credit.” My first thought was that the father of our country was
encouraging the public to use credit which would finally explain why we
celebrate his birthday by buying a new sofa and making no payments until the
year 2525. I’ve always wondered why we celebrate our founding father’s birth
with ridiculous credit deals…now we know it was because he cherished it.
The little paragraph rambled on about bonds and establishing
American currency and credit blah, blah, blah… I quit reading when I saw there
wasn’t going to be a smokin' deal on a mattress or sofa bed. What a rip-off.
“All the measures of government are directed to the purpose
of making the rich richer and the poor poorer.” No, that’s not a quote from
Bernie Sanders from last year; William Henry Harrison said that in the campaign
of 1840. Harrison was a Whig, which 20 years later morphed into the Republican
Party. I guess back then the Democrats were the party of old rich guys…but I
digress.
Harrison was elected on a platform promising to dismantle
the corrupt spoils system set up by Andy Jackson and to look out for the needs
of the common man. He was inaugurated in January of 1841 and was dead 31 days
later. Apparently policies that threaten the wealthy have always been bad for
your health, which probably explains why most presidents since then have taken
such good care of rich guys. Seems legit.
James Polk was quoted as saying, “No President who performs
his duties faithfully and conscientiously can have any leisure.” Clearly
President Polk didn’t own any private golf resorts, have a place in Hawaii or a
ranch in Texas but he did managed to get a few things accomplished while in
office. In just one term as President he acquired California from Mexico (just
before the1849 gold strike, so it was the deal of the century), managed to
steal Oregon from Britain, reorganized the Treasury and lowered tariffs to
stimulate the economy.
A President who won’t take a vacation and actually gets
things done…what a concept!
Teddy Roosevelt had a simple economic policy, “All I ask is
a square deal for every man.” You’ve got to love Teddy!
In 1929 Herbert Hoover said, “If a man has not made a
million dollars by the time he is 40, he is not worth much.” Later that year
the stock market crashed and the Great Depression began and lasted through his
presidency. From where I sit, if you make a million bucks by age 40 then
destroy the economy of your nation before 60, you’re not worth a hell of a lot
either….but I’m no economist.
President Kennedy, the son of a rich businessman, said, “My
father always told me that all businessmen were sons of bitches, but I never
believed it till now.” Apparently most American voters didn’t believe it
either…until now.
The first President Bush said, “Read my lips: no new taxes.”
Uh huh. The second President Bush said, “If money isn’t loosened up, this
sucker could go down.” The Bushes were clearly great foreign policy Presidents.
President Trump said, “You can’t con people, at least not
for long.” The jury is still out Mr. President but with every passing day and
every tweet you’re starting to prove your point.
Thanks to a cheap airline I learned something this week; I
learned that we could really use William Henry Harrison or James Polk in the
White House again! Or Teddy Roosevelt…you’ve gotta love Teddy!
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